Thursday, September 16, 2010

Medium or Well-Done

My mother and I have an old, bad habit of being sucked into celebrity award shows. This vain obsession is usually not because we care who wins which award, but more to see the fashion do's and dont's. I know, I know what you are all wanting to say: "Ashlei, why are you filling such fluff-tuck, (yes, I'm sure you used that exact word) into your mind? It's an incredibly wasteful, vain, unproductive use of your time." I tend to agree, but then every year some celebrity shows up in some beyond crazy outfit.

Who remembers this one?




There are just too many horrible outfits these days. I sometimes wonder if celebrities are purposefully trying to be nominated for the "worst dressed" award. Well, I found one that will become my new #1 worst celebrity outfit. It was cited at the VMA Awards, and although I didn't actually watch it, I had to see it with my own eyes. A picture says a thousand words, so I will let you construct the sentences. . .or at least the flabbergation.







Yes! In cases of extreme beauty I would always hope to hear the sound of crickets streaming gently in the background because every eye gazes to wonder what their eyes have seen. Crickets just isn't the right insect for this scenario though. I would change it to maggots or flies; it seems more fitting. Really Missy-Raw meat?

Point being, as much as I love Lady Gaga and her beyond strange, weirdness: I THINK SHE'S GONE TOO FAR! A vivid image comes to mind of a rabid dog chasing her onstage. As well as audience members throwing up from an infestation of Trichinellosis. I know it's a little absurd, but so is her outfit! I can only imagine how the owners of the theater must feel. I'm sure they will have to replace her chair cushion and most of the carpet for fear of larvae-hatching maggots! GROSS!

All this craziness has influenced one decision: you just have to embrace the weird, craziness. And with that being said, I need to see Lady Gaga in concert now. She's coming to SLC in March and I may just have to be there with a couple of ladies ready for an adventure. Takers?

2 comments:

  1. Oh my gosh you are hilarious! love your deepest, innermost thoughts on this subject!

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  2. I can NOT believe that's actually a real outfit. Honestly. I kept thinking it must be fake, because, well... I don't know... common sense? About ready to puke just a little. blech.

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